Requiem for Reality

I heard a melody the other day,
I believe I heard it, then again...
it could have been the wind.

I tried to hum it out,
tried to take it with me,
I tried to hold on to it as it slipped out of my lips...

It sounded like you,
like something you would say to me,
...and then everything was quiet.

The pictures are fading...I rub my eyes,
Reminiscing on a dream of a memory in the past of a life..
I could not have lived.

I squint and strain, to see an image.
My hands have not forgot, the scent is not forgot.
My eyes betray me though the picture is burnt in...

This room is going dark.
Can you hear me?
Can you see me?
Maybe I can't see you...

Because I've gone blind...or maybe I stopped looking

Don't try to fix me, I am not broken.
My heart in the open, my tears become oceans.
I am what you see, nothing more and no less.
Sometimes I too bleed, in the midst of a breath.

Don't try to fix me, I am too broken.
Pieces of my soul strewn about the floor.
my vessel is empty, the memories miss me.
the absoluteness of this hones to the core.

Please won't you fix this? I am too broken.
I call out as loud as I can whisper.
Is all that I can muster, a feeble fevered bluster.
Unintelligible cries that are sobbingly spoken.

I apologize, I shouldn't have placed you on the shelf.
to collect the dust that falls from the rafter.
When the wind in the house blows, from me chasing it after.
I shouldn't have let you go on and bleed there alone.
out in the cold, knowing one day you'd be...froze

I can feel when you move, I ache your pain when you break.
Sorry I haven't taken better care of you.
I left you in the hands of someone else, in hopes that they
wouldn't make the same mistake.
Sorry I've broken you apart, I tried to pick up all of the pieces.
but we can never go back to these halves being whole
No matter how we bend or mold or crack and fold.
until we collapse from the stress and the strain...
As I feel you stop trickling in my veins.
And my pain....like a vice on my chest.
no longer the same, no longer maintained...

There is no time and place
Nor could they separate us

There is no right or wrong
Nor reason or passion

There simply IS
there is...you...I am sure of that

At least I'm sure there is me
And if I am you then there must be me too

There will always be
Even in the darkness of death
The endless sea?
nay, even torn asunder from the chasm 'tween heaven and hell
Constant...even in the last breath of GOD
Nothing....because beyond all of the things we believe

There is truth....

I laughed at my hand when it drew the blade.
I told it, I would atone for the sins I've made.
It begged me to take back the life I had made.
And then I pushed it in deeper.

I scorned my two feet for the steps that they took.
I cursed my two eyes for the mirror I looked.
The tears I had laid, had written a book.
And then I drove it in deeper

It slipped past the flesh...it slipped past the soul
It ripped through reality, and carved out a hole
My skin became ashen...my heart became cold
And then...I pushed it in deeper

Our blood became time, my hands became numb
my heart was the words on the tip of your tongue
The agony was sweet...we had succumb
And then....you were in peace

I should have loved you in silence
admired you as I did from accross the room
I was invisible, as I am now
Unseen by your eyes, or so I assume

I could have kept walking
but I stopped on that day,
in that field, there I stayed
too long had I tarried.

But the arrows you cast,
and the knife that you brandished
The grin that you bear
have left my heart damaged

The peace I had wished,
Your happiness, has left mine torn and tattered
That night I died
beyond broken....purely shattered

If I were cold, would you take notice
Shalow in breath glass of eye
How can I ask of you to look
or Tary even for a moment.

Yesterday I was weak...I could not think.
My eyes were closed and I was set adrift in my own dreams...
I was after my tail, and when I caught and bit it, I was in pain
Tomorrow is a new day, isn't it?
Can't the sun shine again?
I was confused yesterday, cause I thought.
I thought about today, and what I would say if it came
And then today was yesterday, and I was chasing my tail again.
But tomorrow is a new day...A BRAND NEW DAY...Yesterday is gone...
I took yesterday out back,

and put a bullet in his heart

A moment for a second, or a second from a moment
to you what is it worth?
Would you swim upstream only to die.
Selflessly choose to be last,
even if it was impossible to be anything less
So you wield your knife and spill my me over
And then, only then do you realize that I too bleed
As do you, as do you......
You never lied, even to you the truth was always in your eyes

And it tears through my veins like a 10 o'clock train
my mouth goes dry as if a lake bed drained
my lips slowly burn, my eyes strain
Once more, once more, then none...
is what I claim...

Yet I'm here at the stop at 9:55

Like drinking sour milk I'm instantly ill
I double over in pain
My insides spill.....
One more time, just once, then none....
& then once more and I'll be done

And it cares not! Who seeks you out?
When the fire inside you burns?
When you ache for it, it is no where to be found!
But it follows the breezes that return with the seasons....
..whenever, wherever, however it pleases

So I will not be here. No!
I WILL NOT!
I will stand up and walk out of here....

Yet here I stand at the station, patient
No coat, & and an empty glass....
........again